Day 4: Most Treasured Items

My most treasured things are my memories of Elliot. His soft skin. Chubby legs and arms. Huge feet! The weight of his warm, heavy body on my chest. That new baby smell. How I felt the first time I saw him and the first time I held him.

My most treasured items are the tangible things that remind us of Elliot. The beautiful photos we have, his frog and anything else he touched or wore, and the molds of his feet (thanks to the awesome NICU staff). Also, the scrap book pages the NICU staff made for us.

Day 3: After Loss Self Portrait

I have been nervous about sharing this photo, but I think it is so powerful and full of emotion. This is after Elliot's donation surgery. Our last goodbye.

Day 2: Before Loss Self Portrait

Andy took this photo while I was in labor with Elliot. Obviously early on, before the real pain started. This is the last photo of the old me.

Day 1: Sunrise

The moon setting at sunrise on October 1, 2012.

Sorry for the grainy camera phone photo.

Capture your Grief 2012

The wonderful Cary Marie has designed a photo challenge for the loss community to commemorate Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. I'm not doing it in the official-share-your-photos-with-everyone Facebook event. So I'll share them with everyone via the blog. Here is the list:

http://carlymarieprojectheal.com/2012/09/capture-your-grief-this-october-2012-for-pregnancy-infant-loss-awareness-month.html

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Want to write, can't find the words. I miss him.

Day of Hope

"...August 19th is about honouring and remembering the lives of babies and children that could not stay with us. By doing this we are speaking out about the death of babies and children.

August 19th is a day to break down the walls of society that keep pregnancy, infant and child loss a hush hush subject. People view the death of a baby as just a sad thing that happened. These babies that die are not sad things that happen. They are people, much loved and wanted children. They are brothers, sisters, nieces, nephews, grandsons and granddaughters.

August 19th is about openly speaking about these children and celebrating their short lives.

By having this special day once a year we get people speaking about pregnancy, infant and child loss. And by doing this we break those walls down so that people are not afraid to speak about these children anymore."

Quote and photos copyright:
http://carlymarieprojectheal.com/international-dates/august-19th-day-of-hope

 Elliot, I remember you and I love you, today and forever.